Experiment…number 4….

Alright. Moving forward. I’ve decided that I want to have a first draft by the end of August. YIKES. Which means, really, I need to start working. Putting words to the page. I don’t have an idea yet of the shape of the play. I haven’t even really decided yet if the “writer” character is the main character or not. Actually, that’s a lie. I haven’t decided if he’s a part of the ensemble or if he’s just talked about. He won’t be the main character. I don’t know if it’s about him. Maybe it is.

So. I’ve started writing pages. Here are two RAW, unedited, barely spell checked pieces.

The first is a scene between the girlfriend (Martha) and a friend (Gary) in a bar. This is sometime after the writer (Jimmy) has decided to chuck it all and quit.

Experiment Pages 1

For the most part, I like it. I like the rhythm. I like the concern. I don’t know if I like the names. Had to use something.

This is a scene between Jimmy and Martha. Not sure if it would be before or after the above scene. But, it’s after the decision. When Jimmy realizes… he’s got time on his hands that he’s not sure what to do with. (Which, come to think of it, maybe that excess time might lead to some real soul searching/relationship questions… writing as a way to avoid what’s REALLY going on in his life??? Hm. What IS his work like…?)

Experiment Pages 2

I’m not sure how I feel about the scene. It’s written quick. It’s kinda surfacy. I don’t like a lot of questions in my scenes. But. It’s early. And it’s a way for me to get the characters talking.

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  1. Mom
    Posted July 29, 2011 at 11:34 pm | Permalink

    Ditch those names especially Jimmy unless you are doing a play for kids.

  2. Piyush
    Posted July 30, 2011 at 7:08 am | Permalink

    The dialogues without Jimmy in them are much more interesting then in which Jimmy is in. Like the the one with Martha and Gary are having conversation is interesting. Martha sounds a name of an old lady.

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